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Self Confidence Building by changing perceptions and standards

by Carla Valencia

Confidence is defined as a feeling of one's powers on one's circumstances. Faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way. The quality of being certain. [1] Confidence building is about changing perceptions and standards.

Our self confidence is determined by how we performed in the past in a similar situation. We evaluate the situation through comparisons and perceptions. These comparisons come from conclusions about past achievements, parents, friends and authority figures. How well you performed in the past make us confident.

How is Self Confidence initially Developed?

Our self confidence if developed in childhood. Specially from what as children were told about ourselves. Negative messages from parents, or teachers or authority figures create doubt and interfere with building confidence and self esteem. Another factor is the environment, being surrounded by lack of success, fear of making mistakes and anxiety when trying something new creates lack of confidence and low self esteem.

Self esteem is how much a person likes, accepts, and respects as a person and increases confidence that built upon it. People with a healthy esteem behave with confidence because they do not relay totally on past perceptions. Low self esteem is the key reason that stops a person to be confident. Another factor that influences confidence are standards such as: We have to do it right, We have to win.

There is nothing wrong in expecting things right and want to win. However, this is a flaw that stop us for being confident. If we make a mistake we end up lacking confidence.

How can you become more confident

  1. Make a list of what you like about yourself. Look at them frequently.
  2. Write the things that you do well. A simple but very effective tool to become confident.
  3. Remind yourself that you don't have to let another person to determine that you are worthy.
  4. Talk to somebody you can trust. Especially when you are discourage in any situation. They will give you a positive feedback regarding your value and help you in building confidence.
  5. Take risks. Do something you've never done before and feeling confident will be easier.
  6. Do not take things personally. Next time someone makes you feel angry or anxious, stop taking it personally.

You will not feel confident all the time. It is normal to have fluctuations. Try Building Self Confidence. Building self confidence now will help you be more relaxed and capable in situations that were previously challenging. Instead of nerves making you stumble over your words, or perform below par, you'll do yourself justice wherever you find yourself. All you need to do is pop on your headphones at your computer, or plug into your CD or mp3 player. Highly recommended reading for confidence building - find more practical material - Learn from other's experience .














Source

1. confidence. (2010). In Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary. Retrieved August 16, 2010, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/confidence.


 


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