The fear of abandonment, also called Autophobia [1] , is a psychological disorder characterized by one's uncontrollable fear of being left alone. A form of anxiety, it is commonly observed and is usually harmless, but can be threatening on extreme cases.

Web Med defines autophobia as [2]: An abnormal and persistent fear of loneliness, of being alone. A fear of solitude. Sufferers from autophobia may experience anxiety even though they realize that being alone does not threaten their well-being. They may worry about being ignored and unloved, or they may worry about intruders, strange noises or the possibility of developing a medical problem.

Fear & Anxiety are the foundation of low self esteem. Those who suffer from low self-esteem experience extreme fear and anxiety. The person that suffer fear of abandonment is because she/he was wounded in the past, perhaps she/he experienced feeling emotionally abandoned and therefore they feel unworthy and unlovable. These feelings of abandonment create shame and lower she/he self esteem.

One problem in diagnosing this disorder is that the symptoms tend to be discreet. It is so discreet that most of the time, people are not aware that they are afflicted by it. Anyone can be affected by it. If this fear is interfering with the way you live, you might be suffering from this disorder.

Among some causes of fear of abandonment we find:

• The most common cause is the death, departure, or abandonment of someone important .
• Another cause is a traumatic experience involving being left alone somewhere.
• And the third cause is the memory or stigma arising from an experience while being alone. While these are the most common causes, causes of fear of abandonment are not limited to these three.

The 7 common symptoms that can be observed from people that suffer fear of abandonment are as follows:

1. The person always seeks to reach out to people, especially to those he/she cares about, in an effort to make sure that he/she is not alone.
2. The person panics whenever the other party makes a mistake. This mistake is something they associate with someone trying to leave them.
3. The person makes an "emotional blackmail" to the other person. He/She would say whatever it takes to make the other person stay with him/her.
4. The person would do whatever it takes, even things that they would normally not do to make the other person stay with him/her.
5. The person would rather abandon others first rather than risk being abandoned by them. This is a ploy used to avoid emotional attachment or commitment.
6. The person is in constant need of reassurance from people that they care about in an effort to assure themselves of their love and care.
7. The person always questions his/her self-worth, is unsure of his/her own judgment, and would rather ask for the approval of others.

While these are not clear-cut evidences, when someone is seen to have these symptoms, there is a good chance that one is afflicted with autophobia. In addition, each symptom can have dangerous and potentially deadly consequences when left unchecked.

Overcoming fear of abandonment can be done with a combination of medications, psychotherapy and alternative therapies.

• The patient must be properly diagnosed. After diagnosis, the patient can undergo these forms of treatment. Medications such as tranquilizers and anti-depressant drugs can be prescribed.
• Behavior therapy aims to allow the person to gain control over unwanted behavior by using different techniques.
• Cognitive therapy aims to change unhealthy thought patterns. The patients are also taught how to relax, as stress can trigger anxiety. The patient can also be taught recovery skills, abilities that help them cope with adversity, as the patient ultimately must pursue recovery for and by him/her.
• Counseling and constant communication is important in easing one's fear of abandonment, so a helping hand is always instrumental for recovery. Looking for a Counselor?
• Self Hypnosis will use deep relaxation for building confidence as a person and make the person feel more relaxed around relationships generally. Is like the person can go from desperately needing relationships to merely wanting them as a compliment to their life. Try Being Abandoned so that you can start calmer about all your relationships in general.

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References

1. Anxiety Community. Retrieved June 2011, from http://www.anxietyhelp.org/glossary.html .
2. Fear of Intimacy - the wounded heart of co-dependency. Retrieved June 2011, from http://www.joy2meu.com/Fear_of_Intimacy.html .