Low Self Esteem - a complete description - from vitimization to constant approval - to 23 signs - Identify them, find help

Some characteristics of low self esteem are the tendency to have thoughts and feelings that are negative. To be afraid to make mistakes. Constant dissatisfaction and frustration.

Other characteristics of low self esteem are the tendency to be suspicious and defensive. Lack of boundaries and assertiveness, because of fear of abandonment.

Fear of abandonment and fear of being hurt are also important characteristics as well as avoiding being alone. Fear of change, evasive and lack of communication.

I found a complete description of some characteristics of low self esteem at The Family Center of Northern Alberta (Assoc.). I would like to share them with you:

• Feel and act like a victim. Expecting the worst in life and becoming powerless. The victim mentality causes you to think that you cannot make the changes in your life.
• Self-pity. Afraid of abandonment. We cannot cope with life if we are feeling sorry for ourselves and not taking responsibility. If we learn to feel our pain, understand it and learn from it. We will be in a better position to cope with life events.
• Judgmental. To use judgment to feel better about themselves and put other people down.
• Break agreements, violate own standards. They don't believe in themselves.
• Cover, phony , because they can't be natural.
• Exaggerate, pretend, and lie because of their insecurity. When you experience insecurity your tendency is to believe that you are never good enough. Insecurity leads you to believe that you are incompetent and helpless to face problems in life.
• Self-deprecating, shameful, blaming, critica.
• Nice person, constant approval-seeking, people pleaser because their fear of rejection. Fear of rejection is an irrational fear of not being accepted for who you are. It is cause by lacking confidence and esteem. Would you rather keep this fear of rejection or take risks and live the life you deserve with happiness and joy?.
• Tendency toward negative attitude and pessimism. When you inmerse yourself in pessimism you become a victim. You become powerless.
• Rationalize to justify fear of change. Even if you doubt you can change to improve your esteem there is always the option to see it as a possibility. Once you realize that it is possible, then you will not be so hard on yourself and with perseverance you will start taking small steps and notice small changes.
•  Jealousy /envy , they feel unlovable and unworthy. You don't have to do anything to earn your worthiness. The belief that your worth depends on external factors keep you trap in low self esteem. If you can get in touch with yourself and allow yourself to accept the fact that you are worthy, you are going to be able to overcome this trap.
• Perfectionist , fear of failure and afraid to make mistakes.
• Dependencies - Codependency. Codependents have destructive relationships that are one-sided pleasing and therefore abusive. Addictions, compulsive, stagnant. Eating disorders and other disorders.
• Not liking the work one does.
• Leave tasks and relationships unfinished , lack of intimacy in relationships.
• Judge worth by comparing, feel inferior.
• Doesn't accept or give compliments.
• Excessive worry and anxiety. Those who suffer from low self esteem experience fear and anxiety. They are extremely anxious and lack confidence. The difference between fear and anxiety is that with fear, you can identify the source of your emotion whereas with anxiety the source is unidentifiable.
• Fearful of exploring real self.
• Shun new endeavors, fearing mistake or failure.
• Irrational responses, ruled by emotions . If you deny feelings and emotions it will be hard to take care of yourself. You cannot either deny nor avoid them. But you can always find a way to understand and transform or release them.
• Lack of purpose in life , no direction, confusion.
• Feeing inadequate to handle new situations because of insecurity and perfectionism.
• Feel resentful and One down when I lose.
• Vulnerable to others’ opinion, comment and attitudes. People pleasing and looking for constant approval.

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