Belief System and Low Self Esteem
Boost your Self Esteem Newsletter Issue # 30
Our personal belief system are the ideas we hold about the world and ourselves. They influence our actions and self esteem.
This belief system comes from our programming from childhood. We take our parent’s beliefs that communicated to us through words and actions. Therefore, our parent’s beliefs shape our self esteem.
During our childhood we don’t discriminate between negative and positive beliefs. Our personal belief system is accepted and shaped by parents, family, authority figures and culture.
For example, if as a child we were criticized constantly we might come to the conclusion that we are not worthy or that we are bad. We create a negative belief and as a result we end up having low self esteem. We feel very bad about ourselves and experience negative emotions. This emotions create rules like: if I am bad the only way people would like me is if I please them. Or assumptions: If I do things perfect people will like me. This is then our belieff system.
Low Self Esteem is shaped by a belief system about not being of value. People with low self esteem feel bad about themselves. Their self-talk is critical. A person with low self esteem have no ability to take in praise and tolerate abuse because they feel unlovable . They believe that are worthless, powerless, unacceptable and become people-pleaser seeking constant approval.
How to change our belief system
- Become aware of the negative beliefs. Make a list . This is the first step for discovering your belief system.
- Start examining the negative beliefs and beside each belief write what you did well in the past. For example. Negative belief: I am a bad person. You search your past and you find an instance were you helped somebody successfully. You change the negative belief into a positive belief by acentuanting the success.
- Listen to your inner-dialog , find the negative beliefs and make a positive conversation or say : cancel.
- Write affirmations. Is a good way to change negative beliefs and change your belief system. The best way to use affirmation is with the following example:
Take a piece of paper and divide it in 2 columns. In the first column write the affirmation, for example: I am a good person. In the second column your thoughts, all the negative beliefs that comes out regarding the positive affirmation.
| Positive affirmation | Negative beliefs |
| I am a good person | is not true |
| I am a good person | my mother always told me I was wrong |
| I am a good person | because of me my father could not go to the movie. |
| I am a good person | I had a fight with my brother . |
And so on . Write it down about 20 times. Then analyze the second column. Take each thought and look for positive things in the past that override those thoughts. If you wrote: My mother always told me I was wrong. May be in another occasion she acknowledged something you did right. Write it down de positive affirmation.
By being aware and becoming conscious we can change a lot of negative beliefs about ourselves. This is a process that takes patience and time but at the end you will realize that you are beginning to build your self esteem.
When we change our belief system our emotions and actions change. Start building self esteem by creating a positive belief system.
Resources:
Read Healing your emotional self book review, this is a great book for healing beliefs: I am unlovable and I am worthless, I am nothing without my parent, I am powerless, I am bad and unacceptable, not good enough and I don't matter. Also : Approval addiction: overcoming your need to please everyone book review. There is a lot of information about people-pleaser and seeking constant approval.
Try Self-Esteem Affirmations
Experience the power of Self-hypnosis techniques. Self hypnosis techniques bring a relaxation state and control of your mind and thoughts. A relaxation allows you to be in the present moment and welcome positive programming. You replace negative emotions and thoughts with positive emotions and thoughts. Improve your quality of life The main goal is to access a person's subconscious mind directly. With hypnosis your subconscious mind accesses information that lets you solve problems.
Read free self esteem articles , articles about low esteem and look for recommended books to get motivation and inspiration. Don't forget to visit the self-esteem shop.
