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While it’s great that all people are made differently, some people would rather everybody be equal because they suffer from self-esteem issues. These problems can be caused by a variety of things including past mental or physical trauma, recent bullying issues, or body image problems.
While overcoming the negative emotions often caused by feelings that others are better than yourself, or self-esteem issues in adults can be difficult, it’s possible if you follow some or all of the advice presented in this article.
Diagnose what causes self-esteem issues in adults
The first step in improving your mood, self-esteem and overall outlook on life is to diagnose what causes the problems in the first place. This can be difficult, especially if you don’t know why you’re feeling the way you feel. A good place to start is by looking into your past. If you were bullied as a child because of your weight or looks that feeling of worthlessness can transfer over into your adult years, causing depression, self-esteem issues and more.
Being bullied as a child can have drastic consequences on your future mental health, and admitting you have a problem is the first step in fixing the problem.
Low self-esteem is caused by different factors depending on the background the person. Look at the following factors that might have influenced your self-esteem issues.
5 Factors that affect self-esteem issues in adults
- Excessive Criticism during childhood
If you were always criticized as a child, you might now feel inadequate, not good enough and insecure. May be your parents did not mean to be harsh on you, however, because you were a child you interpreted this correction negatively. In that moment of criticism, you felt unsafe and disconnected.
In the present, when you experience similar situations you evoke earlier experiences and feel frustrated, anxious and like a failure. Also, when there is a lot of comparison regarding the child physical appearance, the child feels that is not attractive and tend to feel inferior which can lead to eating disorders, and severe body image problems.
- Child Abuse and Punishments
Any abuse, verbal, physical or sexual makes a child feel unworthy and that he deserves to be punished. This is a number one cause of feeling unworthy and undeserving.
- Negligence from parents or caretakers
Every child requires attention, love, praise and affection. When a child is brought up without this conditions, he feels insignificant, abandoned and that his needs are not meet. Not only emotional negligence affects the child, but also physical negligence. The child growth up ignoring self-care and neglects his needs.
- Constant comparison with Others
Being constantly compared to siblings and being told to be like them or that they are not as good enough as they breaks your confidence.
Some parents protect their children their unfulfilled dreams. They expect too much or something different of what a child wants. These high expectations create what we know as perfectionism on one hand and guilt on the contrary. If as adults we did not fulfil this expectation we might experience constant guild because we might feel that we have let down our parents.
If you want to start solving your self-esteem issues the first, and most important steps are to figure out what are the causes. Sit down, get yourself a piece of paper and think about this. Write down anything that you remember and try to figure out what is the primary cause of your problems. What is important now is to understand what led you were you are. Do not make judgments; do not feel like a victim.
You cannot change the past, but you can start creating a better future.