Narcissistic parenting is a parenting style adopted by a narcissistic parent, who is a self-focused and egoistic parent showing signs of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). Narcissistic personality disorder makes a person think that they are better at everything and don’t need any improvement, they lack empathy for others and only care about their needs.
This parenting style can prove to be destructive for the children and their personalities. Because narcissistic parents tend to over-control, abuse, and manipulate their children without thinking about children’s feelings, mental state, and needs. A narcissistic parent does not invalidate their child’s personality which results in low self-worth, anxiety, and depression. This also affects their relationships in future life.
This article will explain the narcissistic parenting traits, their effects, and recovery and healing options for the children. If you are a parent, therapist, or caregiver, then you must understand how destructive narcissistic parenting styles can be for a child who has gone through it.
Traits that Reflect Narcissistic Parenting
Several parenting traits reflect narcissism. Some of these traits are given as follows:
- Considering themselves more than others, and only working to fulfill their own needs without any sense of accountability.
- Control issues along with the tendency of verbal, mental, emotional, and even physical abuse.
- Invalidation as well as no empathy towards the children’s personalities, mental state, and needs.
- Manipulation and degradation.
All of these traits have an extremely destructive impact on a child’s life, including low self-worth, depression, anxiety, panic, and fear of expression. Narcissistic parents destroy a child’s creativity and limit their character development which makes it difficult for them to connect with others and make healthy relationships.
Effects of Narcissistic Parenting on Children
Parenting styles play a huge role in the character development and personality formation of a child. A narcissistic parenting style reflects a lack of empathy, appreciation, and validation which can lead to the following results:
- Children who go through narcissistic parenting avoid expressing themselves because of the fear of invalidation and punishment. They have a constant feeling of being on the edge and do not prioritize their basic needs and desires.
- A narcissistic parent can make a child anxious and depressed. Children with narcissistic parents tend to have low self-esteem and confidence.
- The narcissistic behavior of a parent can limit a child’s imagination and creativity. With constant degradation and lack of appreciation, they confine themselves in an imaginary box and fear stepping outside of it.
- Children with narcissistic parents can’t set boundaries for their future relationships. They struggle when it comes to maintaining a healthy relationship in adulthood. They constantly prioritize others as they don’t feel their needs and wants are important too.
- Narcissistic parents never let their children explore their personalities and force them to be how they want them to be. That’s why children never grow a unique sense of self when they grow up, they always try to fit in the boots of their parents.
A narcissistic parenting style negatively impacts a child’s personality, and this impact can be long-lasting, life-altering, and can take a lot of time to get back on track.
Options for Recovering from NPD and NPD Trauma
There are several recovery and healing options available for both parents and children stuck in this scenario.
For Parents: The very first recovery option is therapy. Several family therapy sessions can help parents gain empathy for their children and acknowledge their mistakes. Therapy can help parents learn a new and better parenting style and communication technique. This will help children feel validated and heard as well as improve their sense of setting boundaries and maintaining healthy relationships. Parents must acquire therapy as soon as they can to ensure no further damage is done to the child.
For Children: For children who are currently facing or have gone through narcissistic parenting, therapy can help them open up and share what they feel inside their hearts. Therapy can make them feel heard and validated which ultimately results in increased self-worth and confidence. Therapy can also help cure anxiety, panic, and depression, and heal from the damages of emotional, mental, and verbal abuse. With therapy, children can learn to maintain healthy relationships and set boundaries. Children can also learn about narcissistic parenting disorder and coping techniques with the help of psychotherapy. Qualified therapists can play a very crucial part in children’s lives in this case and help them break free from fears and move forward.
Adult Daughters Of Narcissistic Mothers
Do you feel like you can never please your mother, no matter what you do? Do you struggle with low self-esteem, anxiety, or depression because of her constant criticism and manipulation? Do you feel guilty or ashamed for wanting to live your own life, independent of her demands and expectations?
FAQs About NPD
Can a parent realize their NPD? If yes, then how can they change it?
According to several research, parents with NPD can take a step back and change their damaging behavior. It is quite difficult for a narcissistic parent to realize their mistake and empathize with their children but it is not impossible. At the end of the day, it depends on the person if he wants to change or not. If a parent is willing to change, then therapy can help them heal from the abuse they endured and learn a better parenting style for their children. Therapy can stop abusive and controlling behaviors, as well as promote effective communication.
How can children identify their parent’s narcissistic behavior and set boundaries?
A child who is constantly subjected to narcissistic parenting fears everything. That’s why it is tough for the child to identify such behavior and think of breaking free from it. The very first step in identifying NPD is to look for the patterns of manipulation and control issues. After identifying, start by setting your boundaries and being confident about them. If the abuse continues then it is advised to limit contact. Talking to trusted someone for validation and emotional support is also a good idea for escaping narcissistic behaviors. After this, the child needs to focus on his growth and development. Learn how to have higher self-esteem and a unique sense of personality. Finding hobbies you love can also help immensely in healing from the trauma. Also, one can always seek therapy which is ultimately the best way to identify NPD and step out of the cycle of abuse.
Can narcissistic parenting lead to a long-lasting impact on the mental health of a child?
NPD of a parent does impact a child’s mental health, to the extent that the damage can be long-lasting. Mental health conditions like depression, panic, and anxiety may be because of narcissistic parenting. Narcissistic parenting limits a child’s creativity, which impacts a child’s personality development. Because of Narcissistic parenting, a child’s personality and character can be permanently altered. Therapy can be the solution for almost every concern linked to NPD but the impact can be long-lasting and even permanent if no care is provided in the given time.
Are there any effective coping strategies for children?
Coping strategies for children of parents with NPD is, as mentioned above, seeking therapy. Other than that, effective strategies include distancing oneself from the narcissistic parent, learning to set boundaries, and caring for oneself. Coping strategies have a positive impact on a child’s mental health and character development.
The most effective strategy is still therapy. It can not only help you cope with the current abuse but it will also allow you to heal from the damages of the previous ones. Coping strategies ultimately result in improved mental health, better relationships, and increased self-esteem, however, these coping strategies do not work for every person. It differs from person to person, that’s why it is advised to find your coping mechanism.
Can a child take any legal action against his parents with NPD?
Yes, children can take legal action against their parents. There are many legal options available for children to choose from. Children can go to law enforcement and the court system or protective services to ask for help; the severity of the case depends on the severity of the neglect and abuse. Law enforcement services are involved to investigate any criminal offenses from the parent side which includes sexual or physical abuse. Allegations of neglect and abuse can get child protective services involved which can also result in removing the child from the house if necessary.
Not only that, the court system can also offer legal solutions i.e., child support, restraining orders, custody rights, and visitation orders. As much as good it sounds, it is difficult for a child to navigate through the legal system and choose the best option for him that’s why it is advised to look for an attorney or other support systems.
Learn more!!!!! What Is a Narcissistic Mother
Narcissistic parenting disorder is a disorder where the parent is a self-absorbed and egoistic person; shows no empathy towards the child, and has manipulation and control issues. Narcissistic parenting can have a destructive impact on the child’s mental health and personality. Parents with NPD do not hold themselves accountable, invalidate their child’s feelings, and do not care about a child’s emotional and physical needs.
The impact of narcissistic parenting on the child can be destructive. It tends to have a long-lasting and even permanent impact on a child’s mental health and personality. Some of the issues include anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, no sense of self, no sense of setting boundaries, and not being able to maintain healthy relationships.
However, a child can seek help through therapy and overcome these issues. As well as parents can alter their parenting styles with the help of therapists and caregivers. It is crucial for children suffering from narcissistic parenting to seek help as soon as possible and start a healthy and fulfilling lifestyle. Children can learn to communicate effectively, set boundaries, maintain healthy relationships, and get their life’s control back, allowing them to move forward toward a happier and brighter future.